We assume without question that a child comes into the world intact and pure. Naturally, we expect everything to be in order and intact when a child is born. Striving for completeness and purity is better than thinking that something is wrong, something that is probably indelible. Unfortunately, at first only the outside of the child is viewed. Is it physically okay? Is it fully grown? Is his/her skin clear?

We are used to looking superficially; superficial means "as far as the eye can see". Much is still hidden in the newborn child. Much is not yet visible. Apparently everything is fine; after all, the child is fully grown and seems perfectly healthy.

If this turns out not to be the case, we look for possible causes on a physical basis. Crying babies, for example, show us that there is more to it than what his/her external body shows. They let us know that there is more going on. But they can't show/tell what yet; the (incessant) crying is a signal that the caregiver in question needs to look further.

Crying is then actually a self-created, unintelligible means of communication, which indicates that something is going on; the child needs help! Not every parent knows what to do with this, especially when crying becomes stressful for the parent(s).

It is therefore not always possible to comfort the newborn or the growing child. Just because people don't think about it, that it is not always for a physical reason, but sometimes for an emotional reason!

The emotional reason is not visible; it is then only heard through a cry or through resistance and even through physical complaints. When this is not taken into account and the baby seems to be inconsolable, annoying, permanent obstructions can arise. For the child and the parents. Also at a later age.

Perhaps one remembers one's own baby/childhood, or that of a sister or brother. Or people know this from the parent when he was still a baby/child.

When the baby's signals are not understood by the parents or caregivers, they remain stored as emotional memories in the child into adulthood. It is therefore not surprising that the next generation (children) has a chance to undergo the same, without knowing where this behavior comes from! After all, everything is passed on, including the emotions that can be very stressful for the child, for example via the DNA.

The behavior is then actually not of the child, but of his/her predecessor (father/mother, grandfather/grandmother, great-grandparents)! It is therefore clear that the quality of this young life depends on the previous generations. Being a child, and the inherent experience of this, is of essential value for the child itself, but also for the next generation!

The saying "what you sow, you also reap" applies here, I would say. It's sad to discover that not every child can be themselves, just because of the incriminating data of their own parents or grandparents (called genetics).

The latter did not know at the time that this phenomenon could be harmful to the child! However, if the child is allowed to be a child, it unfolds in such a way that sadness, loneliness, lack, awkwardness, not accepting itself and self-destruction do not – or only minimally – have to take place.

Let the parents make up for the lack of the child in themselves, so that the parent, the baby and the next generation can be (more) joyful, carefree and loving!

The child should originally be happy and content, without hindrances; it should feel sparkling, ready to start and explore the new life. Let the child be a child without, as much as possible, defects, as little pain and care as possible, so that it can also grow emotionally to its adulthood!

We all agree on that, don't we? Create a better world, start with yourself!

This is also part of our task package in terms of our guidance. Perhaps we can welcome you here!

Well, a change or improvement can be made just about anywhere; one can give this a different twist. Acknowledgment and recognition is necessary to nullify difficult baggage in itself! One is therefore able to give the child within oneself the opportunity to become joyful and emotionally healthy again.

It is allowed to be a child again; a precious faculty, especially when the child can reveal in the parent many ways that the adult did not yet know in himself, without appearing childish!

Audrey